As many of you know, Abby started at a new daycare last Monday. Monday and Tuesday, we were very happy and thought we finally found the place. However, Friday was a different story.
We're looking for your thoughts and inputs here to see if we're over reacting or if we are justifiably upset.
Abby has fallen in love with Ms. Mimi in just a few days. We think she takes really good care of her. However, when I handed Abby over on friday, I noticed that Ms. Mimi smelled bad of smoke. I don't want my child around smoke, or around anyone who does smoke. If this was an in home daycare, I would have never sent my child there. I'm not paying over $150 a week (for three days per week) to have my child being held all day by someone who smokes. It's just not right. So, maybe its not technically second hand smoke (or maybe it is), but Abby is still breathing in her nasty old smoke from her clothes, ugh. If I was breathing it in from two feet away, certainly Abby is too.
That's the worst part, but I'm not sure the following sits any better with me:
Peggy picked Abby up on friday around 1:45. Abby is cutting her top teeth and was not feeling well. Plus, Peggy wanted to meet Abby's teachers. I even told Ms. Mimi at dropoff that Peggy would be coming in around this time, instead of 4:00 when I usually pick her up. When Peggy showed up, Abby was asleep in a swing. Apparently she fell asleep around 1:15. She had a blanket over her entire face (we don't let her sleep with a blanket at home, let alone one over her face). It was not even her blanket!!!! When Peggy uncovered her face, Abby still had lunch leftovers everywhere and a bib still on. Lunch was more than two hours before she fell asleep! It seemed as though she was fed in that swing and stayed in there for two hours before falling asleep. That's NOT ok with us. Seriously, at least clean her up a bit. How long does it take to wipe off her face? 5 seconds?
Not only that, but the bigger picture here is this....Monday and Tuesday when I picked her up, she was perfectly clean and there were absolutely no issues. This just makes me think that Abby doesn't get as good of care during the day as she does right before they know I'm showing up. That's what really concerns me here. I expect my child to be cared for with the same level of care whether I'm there or not. That's what I'm paying for.
So, we're definitely looking for feedback here. Are we being too picky, not picky enough? What are we supposed to do?
All we're looking for is a place that will take care of Abby as well as we do. I understand they have a 4:1 ratio, and we have a 1:1 ratio when we're home alone with her, but at her age, it should not be hard to take good care of her and three others. It's their freakin job after all. We feel like we'll never find that place.
Help!
2 comments:
As a parent (who has also faced some daycare dilemmas), I will say that no one will do a perfect job all the time. Heck, even as parents we are learning...
But, with that said, go with your gut! If you have reservations about that daycare and the care that Abby receives, switch. Chances are your parenting instincts are spot on.
"All we're looking for is a place that will take care of Abby as well as we do."
This is the problem. You will NEVER find a place that fits that bill. Matt and I adore our daycare, but there are things they do that we're not super fond of. That being said, when we drop her off, she's happy to be there. She loves her teachers. She's happy when we take her home. She is fed, diapered (almost as frequently as we'd like) and developing normally. And ultimately, these are the important things.
While one of the big reasons we left our other daycare was cost, part of that was that if I was paying THAT much, I expected certain things. It bothered me that the staff was constantly changing. It bothered me that they allowed another child to knock over the stroller my 8 week old daughter was in. It bothered me that some of the staff had trouble with "don't use diaper cream on the cloth diapers". Those were all red flags, but with the first two, Charlotte wasn't happy. And that was what made me change daycares.
As to the smoking, I totally get your distaste. We asked my mother-in-law to change her shirt after she smoked when Charlotte was really little. That being said, you may have caught her right after she came in from a smoke break. Maybe she didn't get a chance to freshen up before you picked up Abby. Or maybe she just always smells like smoke. What's really important is that you said Abby really likes her. I think the number one important thing about childcare is that your child have a bond with the childcare provider. You can't pay more money to get that.
Daycare is tough. I wish I could stay home because no one will take care of my child like I will. But I use Charlotte as my guide. If she comes home happy and healthy, then I'm happy, too. But I always talk to the teachers when something comes up that I'm not thrilled about. And that's what you need to do as well. Express your concerns, find out what they have to say, and then go from there. Tell them you don't want her to sleep with a blanket. I'm sure they'll listen. You are the parents. But they won't know unless you tell them. If it still doesn't change, then by all means, leave, but don't leave thinking you'll find a place that will take care of Abby the way you would. The only place that will happen is your home with you and Peggy.
So that's my long winded feedback, for what's it worth. Just what I've learned in the few months of parenting I have on you guys. :)
Good luck!
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